I use Grindr as my new TaskRabbit.
Are we all willing to help out a fellow queer? My experience is yes.
I made the move to Amsterdam from Brisbane in 2025 knowing no one and with nary a plan on where to live or where to work.
I used Grindr to meet some new people and make some friends in the queer scene and gather intel on the social scene.
And I did have success in those areas but when it came down to it, with a little more desperation than anticipated, I was using Grindr a little more differently and added a few more things into my profile.
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I made my first move with looking for somewhere to live. I was looking everywhere online and the housing market in Amsterdam was like entering the fifth circle of hell.
I had seen a few other people doing the same thing. Had they been successful? No one would obviously update their profiles saying they had found a place.
I made my username a simple ‘lookin4room’ and added some further context in my bio. And so as I was exploring the different suburbs upon arrival, I would be refreshing Grindr over and over, messaging the friendliest-looking faces.
I got an amazing viewing from it, a place that was my fantasy for Amsterdam, living with fellow queer guys in a house along the canals with wonky steep stairs.
Homosexual 1* didn’t think twice about arranging a house viewing with me through Grindr. He used the hookup app in a similar fashion.
“I think it was me who messaged you as I was looking for someone to sublet the attic,” he said.
“It makes sense to me that gays prefer to have gay roommates,” he told me, although this came after he ended up picking his housemate’s straight female coworker.
A decision that he has come to regret.
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My next mission was my next Amsterdam essential, a bike. And I’m happy to report this one was a success.
A free bike that I’ve been told makes me look like a local and is jussssst enough shitty-looking that it hasn’t been stolen… yet.
We had been chatting before but had never managed to organise a date or a little something else.
He saw the change in my profile and asked me to take this extra bike off his hands. And after a coffee, a flirt and a half, and a kiss, I was riding about Amsterdam.
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Once all of that was said and done, I had summit fever. And so I went for jobs and networking.
I thought Why not? I wanna work with queer people and there were heaps of people linked social accounts with cool job titles.
I started being more open about searching for a job and, lo, something came out of the wood work.
He was what I would imagine to be the Dutch version of my future self. He was in editorial digital content, a few promotions ahead of me. He told stories of his social and personal life that I wish were my own. I wanted this man’s job. I wanted his life.
When we got to the topic of what I as an Australian was doing in Amsterdam, I steered it to my struggles getting a job and my envy of his career.
He had nothing concrete for me but told me he knew someone looking for help with a project, a non-profit for sexual harassment against men.
It was half an opportunity but, hey, Grindr got me proximity and possibility.
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Did I have the odd person looking to exploit a queer in need? Yes.
But then again, that’s to be expected from using Grindr. And in typical fashion, I would exploit the now-elusive ‘Block’ function.
I initially started doing it because I feel an inherent trust and comfort amongst queer people. Reaching out to strangers on the internet is scary and so I chose the beast I know.
Should I feel guilty for using Grindr in this way? Am I leading these queers on if I’m being upfront? Was there an expectation of sex?
I don’t know. It is an age old practice to grant favours from mere flirtation. I may have even inspired a friend to use Bumble for a little help with a trip to Ikea.
My experience with using it to settle in a new city and a new country has made it a staple in moving.
Now, it may be true that I could have been a tad more successful if I put out more but the sweeter queers that want to see the queer community get ahead are out there.
We all want to see our fellow queers succeed. And often a favour between queers goes without saying.
Dare we normalise using Grindr for favours?
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*A pseudonym used for this article. Yes. He chose it himself.